3-5-10 [In route to Alexandria]

I am writing a paper on the consequences of an unequal encounter between the Middle East and the West. I am overwhelmed by the oppressive actions and systemic reform that has taken place to create the despairing realities we have today. I am constantly reminded that prosperity comes at the cost of the other. Exploitation takes face for the footsteps of the powerful time and time again, and for that I am always saddened.
I used to think that institutions held the high cards for change. I used to think that if the right players were on the team humanity had a chance at winning.
I was wrong.
The more invested I become in the people and problems of our world the more I realize the importance of relational action on a micro level; person to person. Not system to citizen, or country to community. Such relations routinely resort to violators and victims on a quest for power or even “democracy”. The self interest in every nation has the potential to destroy all that is good. The self interest in every individual has the potential to destroy all that could be good. The selfless interest that God teaches and develops in every individual who seeks it has the potential to transform destruction into construction. A construction site that is laid with love, stacked with sacrifice and built with belief that change will come when we realize it is in ourselves.
“We need Christians to return back to their Christ”

2-28-10

I climbed Mount Sinai.

The journey began at 11:30pm when we left Dahab for Saint Catherine’s. We spent two days in Dahab (on the coast of Egypt’s Sinai Peninsula) staring at Saudi Arabia which is 13 miles away and snorkeling at the Blue Hole in the Red Sea. We drove for 3 hours arriving at the base of Mount Sinai at 2:30am welcomed by temperatures in the low 30's F and an arctic wind that blew strong enough at the top to move me from my place. We climbed the first two hours by the light of the moon amidst severe camel traffic stopping twice for tea/snacks/shelter from the cold in the shacks along the way up the mountain. After 2 hours, we reached the 770 stone steps built by a monk that make up the stairs of penance. We stopped at the top for more tea and blankets before the sunrise at 6:15am. Then we proceeded to sit on the edge of the mountain bundled in blankets, our feet dangling over a distance too vast to describe. We watched a sunrise that brought new meaning to the concept of beauty and God’s artistry for the world while listening to a group of Korean tourists sing worship songs in the background.
On our drive back we stopped in Exodus 15:22 where the 12 wells are that God turned from bitter to sweet in Mara. The sight is directly across from where they think the Red Sea was parted which was a pretty awesome landscape to take in.
I would never have believed someone who told me that at 21 years old I would climb Moses’ footsteps on Mount Sinai, but today I did—I really did.

As I reflect back on my desires for this new year of 2010 I am reminded of my commitment to live simply and love deeply. I realize in the midst of letting God make this desire a reality I am being stripped and detached from the world and lifestyle I know. The last few weeks with sickness, exhaustion, dehydration and overwhelming academic rigor I have found Egypt to be much of a learning experience than an enjoyable one. I have been uncomfortable socially, culturally, and physically but in that struggle I feel my ties to this world breaking into ropes of simplicity. For this I ache, and for that I give praise.

2-26-10

Flooding has come to Cairo!! Along with thunder, lightning and hail. Just as we were about to depart for the all night bus trip to Mount Sinai the storm came and forced a change of plans. Instead of going to Mount Sinai directly we decided to go straight to Dahab after being told the flooding conditions on the roads there are more manageable. Things did not exactly go as planned. We were stopped by police in the middle of the Sinai peninsula saying we couldn’t go any further due to flooding. We were forced to wait, along with about 15 other "tourist" buses and independent travelers (at 3 am mind you). At this point we called and cancelled our reservations for our hostel knowing the bus would take its place for the night. 12 hours later we arrived!

Poverty does not need your pessimism, it needs your passion. How arrogant and selfish is it for me to rest in the overwhelming realities that bore hopeless assurance that the world is too big with too much suffering and unattainable ideologies. When I accept realities of suffering and poverty to be undeniably too vast to tackle I am burying my God graced compassion along with my kingdom focused mentality for truth. I am giving up before I even start. I am discounting all that God equipped me with and all that He can do with my life. Indeed one person cannot change the world, nor do I think they should, but I refuse to place earthly limits on what one person can do fueled by direction from the God of the universe. It is easy to be hopeless. Simply open your eyes, look around, and be informed. Easy is not the answer; if God is optimistic enough to create us surely we can grasp a piece of the same type of hope.